Transitions can be a mixed bag, from exciting to terrifying, and somewhere in between. Transitions to a new experience, a new school year, or a new setting include anxious moments that, sometimes, lead us away from the very strengths and skills utilized to get here in the first place. 

After a few weeks, the “dust settles,” excitement fades and reality sets in, accompanied by the question, are things going well? The topic of transitions produces no shortage of thoughtful experiences and helpful approaches when considering any transition. Specific to you and your child transitioning to a new setting, here are a few things to keep in mind:

Certainty-if there is an overarching theme, it is certainty. There is plenty in this new experience that is unclear and uncertain. Create certainty where you can, identify what you can control and influence, and let go of what is out of your control. 

Remember, you’ve navigated transitions before. This experience can be a valuable reference point for the current one. Your resilience, patience, and frustration tolerance are just a few of the skills you can lean on. You already possess a skill set, strengths, and confidence; remember what got you here? 

Three things to remember:

Teamwork: Trust those who you are working with. As you ask yourself if things are going well, answer this question by including the professionals in your setting. If not already established, set up consistent time measures to check in and understand.  Cooperative and collective measures and timeframes support certainty and remind you that you are part of a community and working together to support the growth and development of your child. 

Be Realistic: Transitioning to a new setting and measuring if things are going well can be a “slippery slope.” Parents can go from a chaotic, stressful situation to a positive, confident and energizing outcome; once again settling somewhere in between. A new setting will be challenging, introducing new stressors and/or the presence of old ones (peers, academics, stress, freedoms, etc). By design, these stressors will encourage the use of healthy coping skills, identified strengths and confidence, and challenge maladaptive coping skills, strengths, and confidence, simultaneously.. Be realistic with the next step in the change process. Include the team members to support you and share their professional experience with what to expect through the change process. Mistakes can lead to greater growth, internalized strength,  expanded confidence & belief in oneself. 

Self-care: Remember, you can’t pour from an empty cup. As my colleague Kelly McAdams recently blogged about mindfulness, it’s important to take care of yourself. Your own balance, as realistic as your life can maintain, with sleep, exercise, mindfulness, humor, and healthy relationships, is crucial throughout the transition process. Self-care is not a one-time thing; it’s a continuous practice. Start now.